Waiting for the other shoe to drop
Insecurity
Some people might say that I lack confidence when it comes to relationships. And, I know that they are right. I have had way too many bad experiences in dating to believe that any relationship will turn out well. When I meet someone new, I am just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I am waiting for them to say that they have a boyfriend / husband, that they are not interested in my romantically, or to be ghosted. The worst is when they just laugh at you. Telling someone like me to just have more confidence doesn’t overcome the years of unfortunate dating situations. But, I think a lot of people (especially men) can relate to these stories.
For the past month or two I have been exchanging emails with someone and I have really enjoyed talking to them. Good conversation is really attractive to me. I know that they are an only child, so when they told me about their brother-in-law, I thought the other shoe had finally dropped. If they don’t have siblings and they have a brother-in-law, it must mean that they are married. I thought, “well, at least I didn’t get attached to them.” I sent a message back that included asking if I was right. As it turns out, they are not married. It is a close cousin relationship who is married. I don’t know if this friendship will turn into anything stronger, but I am excited to find out in 2022.
Meaning
The phrase, waiting for the other shoe to drop means that you are waiting for the inevitable. It is usually something bad. So, it is like you know that something bad is going to happen soon, so you are just waiting for it to happen. You expect something bad to happen soon. The bad thing is usually implied by the situation.
Example: Our company is losing a lot of money. Now were are all waiting for the other shoe to drop. (the company will fire its employees)
Origin
In the late 1800s to early 1900s, housing construction was not great. You could easily hear what the people above you were doing. When they came home, you would hear them take off their shoes. You would hear the first shoe drop and wait for the other shoe to drop. It was a way to describe that something was inevitably going to happen. The phrase was specifically developed in cities like New York and Chicago where apartments were directly under each other. It is not clear where the “something bad” comes in. It might be because the shoe dropping would make the tenet scared.
When I was in university, I lived in an apartment with a few other people. The guys lived on the main floor and the girls lived in the basement. I was pretty fat back then and the girls complained about me making too much noise. They said I sounded like an elephant. They actually told me to walk softer or walk less. Even now, I worry that I am bothering the people who live under me.
See Also: Pull yourself up by the bootstraps, Big shoes to fill, The writing is on the wall, On pins and needles
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Reference:
https://www.inc.com/melanie-curtin/the-origin-of-waiting-for-other-shoe-to-drop-15-other-common-idioms.html
https://www.yourdictionary.com/wait-for-the-other-shoe-to-drop
https://www.idioms.online/waiting-for-the-other-shoe-to-drop/